HAVE YOU GOT A LIGHT?
Living in Reading, Berkshire, you have to get used to having the police hovering overhead throwing fifty million candles worth of light, most nights, onto everything kicking out a heat trace, carrying out surveillance on the community they serve on their screens in their hundreds of pounds per hour choppers.
Helibobby 999s have been involved in the successful tracking and apprehension of seven compost heaps, two Honda generators at a tomato greenhouse in Mortimer plus a few persistent joy-riders.
To combat my room being illuminated like Wembley I have had to have new hanging blinds made showing a tasteful pale green on one side and 3M reflective strip on the other.
IN MEMORY OF
Paddy Higgins
GID'S NIB
A couple of wrinklies have won £25 Million on the Euro Lottery saying that it's not going to change their lives.
Silly bastards, make them give it back.
2080
Rainy winters snug by the fire, sunny hot summers like Spain growing olives, grapes, lemons and limes; this is climate change - don't listen to them - they're talking bollocks.
HARMAN BACKS BROWN
Harman tells reporters: Like every sturdy knocker, this Country needs a knob and Gordon's the best man for the job.
WELL DONE PIERRE
A big thank you to Pierre, Jean Paul, Luc and Marco, the four Froggie fishermen for starving Britain of goods over the last few days - that's not 'French' at all is it?
HELLO
Please follow one of the many links scattered around to the Orangutan charities.
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