CRUTCHES
Why o why o why do wounded people on crutches standing at pedestrian crossings wait until the bloody lights are about to turn green before deciding to cross the road?
You’re then left sitting there having to make the decision, do I wait and watch valuable green light time pass me by or do I proceed potentially ruining a perfectly good pair of NHS crutches.
Pelican lights should have two ‘stop’ signs – one for wrinklies and injured people on crutches that illuminates four seconds after the pips start going and another for able bodied folk and people too fat to walk, wearing grey slippers, sitting on a burgundy electric shopping cart smoking a Lambert and Butler.
IN MEMORY OF
Paddy Higgins
GID'S NIB
A couple of wrinklies have won £25 Million on the Euro Lottery saying that it's not going to change their lives.
Silly bastards, make them give it back.
2080
Rainy winters snug by the fire, sunny hot summers like Spain growing olives, grapes, lemons and limes; this is climate change - don't listen to them - they're talking bollocks.
HARMAN BACKS BROWN
Harman tells reporters: Like every sturdy knocker, this Country needs a knob and Gordon's the best man for the job.
WELL DONE PIERRE
A big thank you to Pierre, Jean Paul, Luc and Marco, the four Froggie fishermen for starving Britain of goods over the last few days - that's not 'French' at all is it?
HELLO
Please follow one of the many links scattered around to the Orangutan charities.
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