100 WATTS
Tesco and B&Q; the knights in shining armour have decided to stop selling 100 watt light bulbs to British people because we’re buying too many of them to the point where the moon is no longer visible in some parts of the country.
This action, ahead of the Government’s imminent legislation to turn Britain into a dimmer nation than it is now is intended to kick start the purchase of long life bulbs (otherwise known as toxic mercury containing headache making lamps) which are due to be replaced themselves by LEDs in 2010 from which point the night world will become one of pointillism.
IN MEMORY OF
Paddy Higgins
GID'S NIB
A couple of wrinklies have won £25 Million on the Euro Lottery saying that it's not going to change their lives.
Silly bastards, make them give it back.
2080
Rainy winters snug by the fire, sunny hot summers like Spain growing olives, grapes, lemons and limes; this is climate change - don't listen to them - they're talking bollocks.
HARMAN BACKS BROWN
Harman tells reporters: Like every sturdy knocker, this Country needs a knob and Gordon's the best man for the job.
WELL DONE PIERRE
A big thank you to Pierre, Jean Paul, Luc and Marco, the four Froggie fishermen for starving Britain of goods over the last few days - that's not 'French' at all is it?
HELLO
Please follow one of the many links scattered around to the Orangutan charities.
Tesco and B&Q; the knights in shining armour have decided to stop selling 100 watt light bulbs to British people because we’re buying too many of them to the point where the moon is no longer visible in some parts of the country.
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