TAX ME - I'M BRITISH

Life in Britain in these times of austerity means we all have to pull together. Unfortunately, ‘pulling together’ under this coalition government means stealth taxing the many in the pretence of ‘helping’ the few.



Some chavs are apparently drinking too much for their own good? It’s their health, their benefits, so who’s held responsible? All of us – in fact; let’s roll out the British Stealth Tax policy and set a minimum charge per unit of alcohol making everyone pay more pretending to be doing it for the good of a chavs liver and kidneys.


Our borough wants to spend less on costly landfill so let’s roll out the British Stealth Tax policy and charge people over and above their Council Tax for the collection and disposal of domestic waste in the pretence of increasing recycling rates.


People are smoking too much thus draining NHS resources (even though the smokers fund the NHS and VAT would have to rise to 29% just to cover the loss of revenue if all the smokers stopped). Let’s roll out the British Stealth Tax policy and increase the tax on fags again and again and again in the pretence of doing for their health.


Britain’s roads are suffering from a lack of investment by numerous governments with too many cars stifling too few highways. Let’s roll out the British Stealth Tax policy and get private companies to pay for the building of new roads and then make us pay extra to use them. Anyone with half a brain only needs to look at the M6 toll road to realise that this idea is dead in the stalls.


Over packed, knackered, expensive trains smelling of piss are forcing more and more people back to their cars. Let’s roll out the British Stealth Tax policy and bang up the tax on petrol and diesel again and again and again in the pretence of helping the planet.


People who have paid their taxes longer than anyone else are living healthier, longer. Let’s reduce their pensions and benefits so we can share the money out to immigrants and their families who haven’t contributed anything to our country and label anyone who disagrees as a racist or xenophobic.


The Nimrod early warning system being build was too cutting edge, overpriced and behind schedule. Let’s scrap the part built planes so we can save the money and give it to India for their space program whilst their poor starve.